After a month of going to sleep and getting up feeling like I had been run over by a truck, I had had it. I had a second panic attack as soon as I came into the office one morning. It was just a stroke of fortune that a hospital was right across the road. The Doctor prescribed some chewable pills and I told him that I was headed back to my hometown (Bangalore) for treatment. After being subjected to 13 tests from the head to toe, I was diagnosed with 3 inter-related sleep disorders: parasomnia, bruxism and Excesive Daytime Sleepiness.
I sat down with the psychiatrist and told her that I was feeling ‘disconnected’. I joked that it could be a psychological condition called ‘depersonalisation’. She laughed and asked me where I had heard of that term. ‘Bang’ came the reply: Internet. I had been reading up too much on psychology and sleep related stuff on the internet in the past one month. I was just out there looking for some cure; but I now realize, in retrospect that by doing that I was digging myself deeper and deeper into the problem.
Here’s some advice folks: The internet comes AFTER the doctor. Please do not Google for any health disorder issues on your own and read up random stuff from websites and come to conclusions about it. Lots of us like to perform a self-diagnosis. Bad idea, with the exception of this particular post, of course!
Besides some basic medication, here’s how I’m recovering, and these are generally good practices to follow to steer clear of any crap:
1)A positive approach: If you find yourself digging a pit under your feet with a shovel, what’s the first thing to do if you don’t want to get any deeper? You stop digging and get rid of the shovel. I had been gorging on negative information (the serial bomb blasts, and reading crime reports in newspapers). I understood that the media in general is a very negative source of information. I called the housekeeper at the place where I live and asked him to move the TV out of my room. I replaced my daily dose of news with the Monk who sold his Ferrari. Such books are not for ‘losers’ as many would feel; especially the ones that perceive themselves as floating above any need self improvement.
2)Good nutrition: It is important to have a balanced diet, more importantly at the right times in a day. Add health supplements to it if you want to get ahead faster.
3)Water: A minimum of 10 glasses of water a day (say about 5 liters). Drinking water BEFORE you feel thirsty is a good habit. If you have to ‘quench your thirst’, too late and it’s not happening!
4)Yoga: 30 minutes of basic yoga consisting of Pranayam and simple aasanas done regularly for 21 days can cure any sort of lifestyle issues.
5)Rest: Sleep for 8 hours between the same times each day. Do not sleep in the afternoon. And never, ever watch the TV before going to bed. A glass of warm plain milk can help a lot. Unwind for atleast half hour before bedtime. And eat your dinner an hour and half to two hours before you go to sleep.
But all said and done, nothing can really replace one’s attitude. I read a line recently that went like, the person you are going to be is the person who is made in the face of fear. There are many ways of saying this – you are like a tea bag; your true colour is revealed only when your put in hot water. Or, it’s easier to measure a tree’s length when it flat on the ground than when it’s upright.
I learnt that the outcome of every situation is the way we choose to react to it – either as a victim of the circumstance, or a victor of it. So, in every inch of the statement, it’s true that your problem is not really your problem. My problem was not my sleep disorder. My problem was attitude towards the disorder. With all due respect to the doctors, I like to think that the medical expenses went towards correcting my attitude, which in turn put my health back in place.
It’s all in the head.
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